logsinthenight | EVENT LOG: HUNGER AND THIRST

Entry tags:

EVENT LOG: HUNGER AND THIRST

characters: everyone.
location: around beacon.
date/time: september 19-30.
content: some new friends - or enemies? - seek offerings, and offer something in return
warnings: memories may involve violence, death, grotesque body horror. please cw as appropriate.

pining for the things i could have been.

Recently, the forest spirits have been agitated. The crooners, those that remain, chatter noisily and strut with purpose. The lunch lady hunches over their station and holds claws to their face, miming peering through dense brush. The skunk judge murmurs about the ones from the countryside. Word has passed beyond the reaches of Beacon's light - there are people in town, and they are mostly good this time. These lantern-bearers have lasted longer than most. They may even want to help.

Seems these spirits will have to see these people with their own eyes, and test those rumors themselves.

For the first two prompts below, please feel free to NPC spirits yourselves. However, if you prefer, you may post your toplevel under the MOD-CONTROLLED SPIRITS header and we will do our best to drop in and out with interactions as time permits. These are not intended to be one-on-one threads with spirits written by the mods, and you will likely not always want to wait for a mod reply at every step and may find yourself doing some minor NPCing all the same, but we will do our best to keep up with you and your thread partners who tag in!

In that header, please specify whether you want a friendly or antagonistic spirit, or if you want a surprise, you can always say "surprise me!"

ALL MY JOYS.

You come home to find spirits in your wardrobe, with socks on their hands and pants tied in daisy chains from wall to wall. Abruptly they squeak and dive for cover, or crash through windows in their attempts to escape. They steal things that are yours, only for you to find them days later, floating in the lake or buried in the greenhouse. Can you chase them down alone? Maybe you need some help.

Not all spirits are so troublesome. Maybe you turn up at The Landmark kitchen to find that one spirit has already gotten the coffee pot started - well, except it has poured instant cheese powder from a box of easy mac into the pot. But at least it's trying to help! Maybe you can show it how the machine works. Others wind up at Solis's labs where they thumb rapidly through books and peck at computer keys, and more than one takes samples from the shelves and shoves them in your face. Did you need this alien foot in a jar? No?

A pack of roving... branches? crawls around town. They have no mouths with which to speak, but instead vibrate and clack their many tangled limbs together. They grow in number and size, making a thicket of live wood that bars you from a doorway, completely fills up a section of the tunnels under the town - or makes an impromptu and convenient bridge, if you think that climbing on someone's limbs is appropriate. Is it?

Largely these spirits seem neutral, even benign. Confused. They might ask for your help, or try their best but they struggle to communicate even more than the usual forest spirits do. They have no sense of what your personal space is, though, and more than one will reach for a lantern to bring it closer and investigate. Awfully uncomfortable, so what are you going to do about it?

ALL MY GRIEF.

At any moment, the above interactions can go south fast if you meet the wrong spirit. The one who took your lantern? Decides to run off with it, leaving you gasping for air and with very few options if you are to survive. The branches constrict and crush you, or drop you suddenly in the river. Are they here to harm you, or just to test your limits?

Others will be malevolent no matter what. The scrapyard dog snarls and pulls at its chain as it watches the thing that stalks and hunts. A small herd of soft, wooly spirits crouch low to the ground, whimper and pant as if sick or starving, only to turn on you with vicious teeth once you seem invested in assisting. Better hope you have someone nearby who can help you fend them off. Or is it better to try to distract them and make an escape? Will they be convinced to stand down, or will they wear your face as a new mask?

ALL MY BONES.

You are directed by the local spirits to the dense curtain of trees where torchlight fades to darkness. The ones you are familiar with hang back, but nod for you to continue ahead alone, or with a friend or two if you prefer. The more people who go together, the stronger the connection - as indicated by the spirits grabbing at your hands and linking them together, and giving a very serious nod. Bring your offerings whether they be food, stories, gifts, or memories of your own, and hope they are sufficient. Place them on the forest floor, or hold them out to the air. The new spirits will find you, they promise; this is not a trick. Make yourselves comfortable on the damp, mossy ground and wait for the sound of footsteps in the leaf litter.

For this prompt, you are welcome to describe your arrival to the site if you like, but all that is required is a comment with the names of the people involved, and the offerings you bring. Characters can make multiple offerings and visit multiple spirits as many times as they wish.

Afterward, a spirit will lead you back to Bonfire Square and encourage you to tell others what you've learned from your new guests. No fair keeping the goods to yourself alone!

LEFT IN THE LONG NIGHT.

After connecting with spirits, you are led back to the bonfire, to recover and recuperate from the joining of hearts, minds, and memories. You will find yourself weary, in a way the flames seem to help. The glow of the campfire is comforting, tempting. It might be difficult not to fall asleep or try to draw others into enjoying the comforting lull of crackling firewood along with you.

The weariness does fade, after some time around the fire. You're not the only one resting from the experience in the glow of firelight — and there's likely things you've seen to share. Ideas and memories and pieces and figments of past to fit into place like puzzle pieces. Now is a good a place as any to share it, isn't it?

Lastly, those that approach a spirit in tandem will find an unseen consequence. A link between them that isn't so easily shaken by a short stay at the fireside. Characters will find that feelings and sensations seem to move from one to the other without warning. Fear, anger, mourning, resentment, joy, love. Touching makes the link stronger, but even distance isn't enough to stop it. Did you want to share night terrors, even a mile apart? Or to taste coffee, even though you're in the middle of brushing your teeth? Well, too bad. The effects will last for two weeks, whether you like it or not.

QUICKNAV
comms	\|	network • logs • memes • ooc
pages	\|	rules • faq • taken • mod contact • player contact • calendar • setting • exploration • item requests • full nav

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Soldat is so startled they drop the can of cocoa. Thankfully, it stays closed, rather than spilling everywhere.]

What.

[They never. They didn't tell him about Sarge. Or the Asset. They should have, maybe they should have, but it's so-- he's not modern, he's not understanding, he might not understand--

There's no more voices, Sarge shocked into silence, but there is a sudden spike of fear.]

( Javert nearly pulls himself from the chair, overwhelmed as he is with concern. His first instinct is to go to him, to retrieve the can of cocoa and see if he is alright, but given that he's the one giving Soldat anxiety, that may not be welcome. He remains where he is, then, and continues calmly, )

You were speaking to him. There was another voice as well, but I know not who it belongs to. What is happening?

( He feels as if he's losing his mind, but it isn't for the first time. )

[The plates in the metal arm are shifting, and Soldat is looking kind of wild-eyed, at the wall, not at Javert.]

In my head. In my head. He didn't come out. How did you hear that.

[They, too, have felt like they're losing their mind the past couple of days, but they haven't really felt sane since HYDRA, so.

(Hey, uh. Is he hearing me now? Yes.) There's another new one, though it might sound familiar if Javert remembers the lantern malfunctions. Sarge and the Asset mostly sound like Soldat, just with accents and inflections and volume totally different from Soldat.]

( He recognizes the latter voice, the monosyllabic answers spoken without emotion. He blanches a bit at the realization, and his mind fills with bewilderment. Has Soldat had these voices in his head all this time? Why are they there, and what does it mean? There are too many questions, and Javert cannot give voice to them all at once. )

I don't know.

( He tries to come up with an explanation. When did the emotions begin? )

Since we met that spirit, I've not felt like myself.

[(... yeah he's hearing it. Okay. I, uh, am gonna shut my trap now. You, too, Asset.) Soldat is trying not to hyperventilate. Javert does not need to know their-- yes he does. He does need to know their names. He should have known their named months ago, when the Asset first stuck around, but the Asset obeyed him so it had been fine, it had--

They sort of hear his explanation. Mostly.

Okay, they need to focus. Need to stop panicking. They brace both hands on the counter, breathe slow, and think about folding paper. Javert will hear it too, maybe see it in his mind, the one fold, two fold, fold back on itself, the start of making a crane. It helps. And it means now they know what's going on. They breathe out, breathe in, then say, haltingly,]

Sorry. I thought I was just going. More crazy. Before I took you two. Lingering spirit-memory or. Shoulda figured it out.

( It's strange to hear every thought Soldat has in his head. The confusion is still evident in their connection, but Javert doesn't seem the least bit upset. Why should he be? It's not as if Soldat knew what would happen, and he's well within his right not tell Javert about his voices. There are still many things about himself that Javert's never admitted to Soldat. There's never been a good moment to mention it. He sits by quietly, doing his upmost to keep his mind clear and not think of anything while the other man calms himself down. )

It matters little now.

( He answers evenly, or evenly as he can while recovering from something so surprising. He looks up, watching Soldat's back. )

Why are you afraid? Do you think that I would cast you out now that I know the truth?

I. It's.

[They hunch their shoulders in a little, still braced on the counter.]

I know it's weird. Crazy. Not being alone in your own head. Didn't want you to. Think I'm not functional or or or damaged.

[Which is an old fear, really, even if it's true, and Soldat is pretty clearly damaged. But Javert is a friend and not a handler, and not going to send him for maintenance. There isn't any maintenance here.]

I should have told you. They do come out sometimes. Talk with my mouth.

I don't recall that ever happening.

( Other than the time when the Asset was out, but that had been because of a lantern malfunction. Javert has seen men that have been driven insane, and Soldat is nowhere near that far gone. )

There's nothing inherently mad about speaking to yourself. Why should it matter whether I think you're broken? I've known that about you since the day we met, and yet I have not turned away. Why should this be any different?

( Sadness spills through the cracks of their bond, as well as something that Soldat would recognize as compassion. Javert does not find the feeling as disagreeable as he used to, even if it is still somewhat foreign and terrifying. )

After what you've been through, I would be surprised if you were not a little damaged. You needn't blame yourself for it.

[A tremor runs through Soldat at the feeling, and they squeeze their eyes shut, still hunched over the counter. What comes seeping through in return for the sadness and compassion is a kind of pitiful gratitude, maybe a little bit of shame.

The flesh hand comes up to scrub at their eyes, which are leaking. Somehow, they're not surprised at all. It's been a while since they've had a crying jag, and this probably counts as a good reason.]

I'm sorry. I. Should have trusted you.

( There's a prickling of tears in his eyes that are not his own, and that only seems to send Javert into further dismay. He stands and crosses the room without even thinking, stopping only when he's within an arm's reach of Soldat. He doesn't know what to do. Even after all this time, he still has difficulty giving comfort, though his honesty has been reassuring thus far. He speaks lowly, )

You needn't be. It is I who must try harder.

( He's been trying for over a year now. He doesn't wish to be the man he was before, even if it was simpler. )

I don't wish for you to be afraid of me.

I'm not. I'm not.

[They push off the counter finally, hearing him come closer, turning to give him a worried, unhappy look, still crying a little, though thankfully it's just tears and not the nasty sobs they know they're capable of when they get really upset.]

I know you won't hurt me. I know.

[They hesitate only briefly, then reach over with the flesh hand, and grasp his shoulder, next to his neck, like they did to Steve, like they did the night of Javert's birthday. Javert had liked that, right?]

It's just. Stupid and embarrassing, sometimes. To be broken.

I know.

( He's felt broken as well ever since he found Valjean on the shore of the Seine. He has a duty now, but beyond that, there is little for him to live for. Even now, there's still a great difficulty in living and following his conscience, though not so much as before. )

But you will get better. You have been all this time.

( He trembles when he feels the other man's hand on his shoulder. All at once, Soldat's emotions flood into him, overwhelming and uneasy, and Javert can no longer stop himself from crying. Tears spring to his eyes, but he continues on steadily, anxiety gripping his heart. )

I've never told you, have I? How proud I am of you. Discovering these things about you changes nothing.

[Well, now they're both crying. Soldat sniffs once and tries to rub the tears away, but it's not very effective with a metal hand. They want to pull him in, do-- do something. Hug him. But the thought also makes them want to shudder and wedge themselves into a corner. Why are they so fucked up, it's not fair. They grip at his shoulder like a lifeline, instead.]

I. Sir. Thank you.

[Maybe they can use their words, instead. Javert might not have told them he was proud, but they also haven't actually told him:]

I love you. I hope you. I hope you know that, too.

( Perhaps if they were not so hesitant with one another, Javert would feel compelled to wipe the tears from Soldat's face himself. Such a gesture would be much too intimate, however, and unwelcome, and the touch of the other man's hand against his neck is already overwhelming enough as it is. He feels Soldat's emotions as if they are his own, and when he berates himself, that only seems to send Javert into further dismay.

Don't, he tells him, speaking through their bond. He reaches up and covering Soldat's flesh hand with his. He will not take from him anything the other man is not comfortable giving, and Javert is patient. He will wait, and he will not force the issue.

It doesn't take long before his hand begins to shake, his entire form shuddering in surprise. Love is as much an unknown thing to him as any, and it disarms him as much as it does when Valjean had done the same by setting him free. He doesn't understand it, and he doesn't know why anyone would feel such a way for him. )

How do you know? ( He asks, not out of skepticism, but curiosity. )

[That touch is fine. That touch is good. And it makes Javert feel better, too, so even if it wasn't, it's worth it.

They take the question seriously, because it's a valid question. They had to ask it, themselves, when Misty first introduced the idea to them.]

I had to learn. It took me a while to recognize it. But I know. It's warm and comforting. And challenging. And it's helping and accepting help. It's the same thing I feel about Misty. And felt about Steve. It's the same, and there wasn't another word for it that fit.

( He considers it for him a moment. He had asked the same thing of Rosalind when she spoke to him about Robert. How did you know that you loved him? She had said it was because he was the only one who respected her, because he took care of her when he had no reason to do so. His kindness made her love him. Javert had not understood it then, but now, after having experienced similar emotions, he realizes, )

Perhaps I feel the same.

( He cannot say it out loud. The affection is there in their bond, though, and there's no mistaking it. )

I didn't know. I had not thought it possible.

Edited 2020-10-05 00:39 (UTC)

[It's good enough, more than good enough. It makes them sigh with relief. Even if he hadn't felt anything like that, Soldat would've been fine. They would've understood. But now that don't have to.]

I didn't either. At first.

[They make a watery little smile.]

Couple of dumb mooks taking forever to work out love.

( He returns the smile, soft and a little hesitant. He's never known much of happiness, but he knows that this is what it must feel like, and it is not so terrible. It radiates from Soldat as well, and that is perhaps the most surprising thing. Javert trembles at the realization. )

God help us both.

( He says, squeezing Soldat's hand before wiping the tears from his face. There's a part of him that almost wants to feel foolish for having cried so much in front of him, but Soldat has never cared, and he's never seemed to respect him any less. Even so, he reaches for a dish rag. )

We should make ourselves presentable before the others come.

[One more squeeze to his shoulder, and Soldat steps back, too, dabbing their eyes with their sleeve.]

Misty's seen worse. I've fallen apart in her old cabin three or four times, now. I punched a hole in her wall once, back in the old cabin.

[But they'll pull out their handkerchief, which is more effective than a sleeve, and finally retrieve the tin of cocoa off the floor.]

She wouldn't let me fix it. She. Framed it. Ugh.

( Javert wets the dish cloth and uses it to wipe the tears from his face. Had it not been for red around his eyes, it would be impossible to tell that he had wept. He composes himself a little, but he doesn't return to his spot at the kitchen table, hovering near the other man. )

Much of what that woman does mystifies me.

( Though that's something that could be said of many people. They are all much too emotional for him. )

Was there a reason why?

Edited 2020-10-14 00:21 (UTC)

Reminding me not to do it again. And that maybe I'm allowed to be angry sometimes.

[Their nose wrinkles up at that, and they start filling the kettle with water. Cocoa. They're going to fucking make cocoa, and they're both going to drink it and feel better.]

Asset took over, then. The. Loud one that only does one word at a time. That you met during the lantern problems.

So it was not simply a lantern issue?

( He focuses on that. The rest of it is still a little perplexing to him, but he supposes it will always be that way. Best to focus on the more immediate problem, and the thing Soldat was most concerned about him knowing. )

Has it happened since?

[Soldat sets the kettle on the stove and leans over the counter to flip open their lantern's shutters more fully, revealing the panel they usually keep hidden, the one with the small crack leaking green light.]

Ever since the lanterns malfunctioned. This, and the Asset, have been here. It has only come out a handful of times. Once to help me against green-eyes. Or to try to.

( Javert frowns in consternation, eyeing the pane of broken glass. To anyone who doesn't know him well, it would almost seem as if he's become wary of the other man, but his caution is only borne out of concern. He doesn't hide it well. )

Doesn't it terrify you?

( He asks, without looking away from Soldat's lantern. He can scarcely think of anything more horrifying than the thought of losing control, and becoming the man he once was. )

You do not think he will harm anyone?

Yes.

[Not like that's hard. Soldat is terrified of many things, but losing control and becoming the Asset again is pretty high up on the list. They close it up again, gently, as if afraid of doing more damage.]

It hasn't tried to hurt anyone in a long time. It warned Misty it was getting violent. So she could let us go away for a little. It tried to save us from the green-eyes, when they were kidnapping us. Hasn't been out since.

[(No. What is it, Asset? No.) Soldat sighs a little, sure Javert heard that, too.]

I don't know what it means. Most of the time.

EVENT LOG: HUNGER AND THIRST

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)