carriedbylight: (Default)
Kairi ([personal profile] carriedbylight) wrote in [community profile] logsinthenight 2019-08-01 07:15 pm (UTC)

"Yes, it is." She replies to Riku's denial. It's exactly the sort of thing Riku would say to her to keep her heart from becoming too heavy, no doubt feeling a sense of responsibility, himself. This time, however, there's no way to reason away her blame. Perhaps she's known since finding them in Beacon that their deaths link back to her, hiding in a sense of denial due to the fact that it was simply easier to swallow. Now, however, the veil has been lifted and the fact is laid bare before her. The time for denying it has passed.

The string of thoughts that follow the guilt can't be stopped. Maybe if she had been stronger, this wouldn't have happened. She should have been more alert, aware of her surroundings. Xemnas had taken her from them as easily as picking fruit from a tree. That thought makes her heart ache, the thought that, despite what must have been the equivalent of months of training, she had been taken out of the game so easily gnawed at her insides. She should have been more prepared. And if she had thought she wasn't prepared enough, she should have simply stayed to the sidelines, instead of following them into battle and becoming a liability.

"Sora went after me. You went after Sora. There's no way you can say that it wasn't because of me, Riku." She says, her voice taking on an uncharacteristically somber sort of sound. She knows that none of them blame her. It's why Riku is so adamant about telling her it isn't her fault. But it doesn't stop her from blaming herself, the disappointment far greater than anything she's ever felt.

But what good is acting down in front of them going to do? It will make Riku worry all the more about her, causing a whole new set of issues. It's time to put on a brave face. Kairi offers him a small smile, crossing her arms behind her back. "I'm sorry." She says. "I'll definitely find a way to make sure we all go back home, alive and well." Or, at least, Sora and Riku.

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