Santa Claus is... ( he pauses, consideration crossing his face before he chuckles. )

God, I don't know the last time I had to explain Santa Claus. It's this thing they tell people where I'm from about this man who lives in a specific place on Earth and on one day a year, he brings presents to people. He's not real.

( just to make that clear. ) He supposedly has an army of elves and gets around via a sled and reindeer.